Sometimes Natha’s poop is better analyzed than the rising Yamuna waters

Few weeks back I watched this movie called Peepli [Live]. Now if you are in India and have not heard about this movie, then it’s probably because

You live under a rock in the middle of Thar desert

You tribe lives in one of the protected jungles

You are illiterate, blind, deaf, all of these

You live in a different country (at least you think so) called Tamilnadu

You live in Bombay (which is almost not India, even if you think so), and only poverty you have known is in the slums (which is more of squalor, more about unaffordable real estate and less of actual ‘going without food’ poverty).

Take your pick.

This movie is about a brother duo, who happens to be small farmers in some village in the Hindi heartland. And by extension very poor. They have mortgaged their small strip of land for their mother’s medical expenses. Since they cannot repay the loan, one of them, Natha Das Manikpuri, decides to commit suicide to get the compensation from the government.

What follows is a huge drama over the suicide, played by the frenzied media and the wily politicians. Of which the movie is touted to be a satire over. And it’s a very finely done satire. Not too understated and not overtly loud. This fine satire is the most likable thing about the movie.

You laugh through the movie and in the end go home with a compelling issue or two to think about.

While I can tell a thousand likable things about the movie like the real characters, the almost real story, the fabulous presentation and the immaculate attention to details, I will not.

That is because this post is not about reviewing the movie. Which I wanted to do but got too lazy about.

This post is just to draw attention to the current drama in the news media. The case in point my people is, the flooding of Yamuna River and the imminent floods in Delhi. Although waters did not enter the city, but we got severely flooded by all the ‘exclusive and by the minute’ reports of the water levels of Yamuna and how far above the danger mark it is flowing.

What pisses me off is to hear every day for last two weeks that by 4 pm (or near about on different days) the water will be flowing 2 meters above the danger mark. Every single day.

Monday (before 4 pm): another 2.5 cusecs of water has been released and by 4 pm Yamuna will be flowing 2 meters above the danger mark. Monday (after 4 pm):  water is currently flowing at 1.8 meters above the danger mark. Will be above 2 meters above danger mark by 4 am.

Tuesday (before 4 pm): another 1 cusec of water has been released and by 4 pm Yamuna will be flowing 2 meters above the danger mark. Tuesday (after 4 pm):  water is currently flowing at 1.8001 meters above the danger mark. Will be above 2 meters above danger mark by 4 am.

……………..

……………..

Friday (before 4 pm): another bout of rains and by 4 pm Yamuna will be flowing 2 meters above the danger mark. Friday (after 4 pm):  water is currently flowing at 1.899 meters above the danger mark. Will be above 2 meters above danger mark by 4 am.

And all of a sudden today, water has started to recede. Despite huge rainfall in the city.

If you have been feeling acute concerns about the floods in Delhi, hold on for now. You have been duped. And I wonder if you will be really concerned if it really happened. What with having exploited out of all your emotional juice.

Besides, how this flood will put the commonwealth games in jeopardy, as if it is not already. But that is another drama in its own right.

Or how dengue will be an epidemic, like it is not already.

The high point of all this is this: one fine day the news anchor is waxing eloquent about how water is above 2 meters above danger mark, a caption just next to his face showing 2.01 or some such number. And the news flash at the bottom of the screen shows 1.8 meters.

Well, we all need to know and hold on to the high points when there is flood at your door steps.

Talking of high points, one high point in the movie is this: Natha goes for the ablutions and goes absconding from thereon. Bereft of a subject, one of the news team camping there goes on to broadcast the analysis of color and consistency of Natha’s poop. That apparently helps to determine the emotional and psychological state of the person.

That was at least hilarious.

If you have friends and family in Delhi, don’t worry. They are perfectly safe. Unless they have been meditating in a tent on banks of Yamuna. In that case they deserved it.

Water logging in low lying areas is only a little worse than what you get after a day of good rainfall.

Now can I have some more analysis of Natha’s poop please!

Life is but an optimization game

This is one of those days. You know, when I am not making fun. So here is the serious stuff.
Consider yourself warned.

Welled up with choked emotions?
Holding tight grief of letting go?
Find that sink to pour it in
Look around there's an ear so


No balm better than a smiling face
No balm better than a perky tone
No balm better than a hand in hand
No pain worse than suffering alone


Letting go can be cleansing
If you see the convoluted fun
Just don't fill the void in a hurry
Bad filler is worse than none


Life is but an optimization game
And dollops of macabre constraints
Winning is finding the best of stations
Losing is just being restrained

No honey, not until we decide on your side of the bargain

Few weeks back there was this video of a stick man and a stick woman posted on facebook. Someone amongst my friends or their friends or may be their friends posted it. Can’t remember it now. You know how it is with social networking. You are supposed to be in touch. So much so that you end up forgetting who it was that you touched.

I have been terribly caught up with work for last few weeks now. But I had to write this post about this video that has caught my fancy and made me think about it. So I came back early today to write about it. Yeah, nine in the evening IS early. It just depends on the perception.

I digress no more.

So here was this video with this song playing in the background and Mr. Stick Man and Ms. Stick Woman enacting the song. Not only on facebook but every lady and not any man I have known went so ooh aah about this song. I completely understand. Here is the song. It’s a good ol’ song by good ol’ Adam Sandler. Yeah the same funny man. But this song was not sung in jest.

I wanna make you smile
Whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All i wanna do, is grow old with you

I'll get you medicine when your tummy aches
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
So, it could be so nice growing old with you,....

I'll miss you
Kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold
Need you
Feed you
Even let you hold the remote control.

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink
Oh I could be the man that grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you.

This might be a man’s world but when it comes to romance my fellow men you are a mockingbird. You know, they don't kill you mainly because you do no harm. You don't do one thing but sing your hearts out.

That is all that I am going to say about this. Of course apart from this little advice to Mr. Stick Man. Dear Stick Man if you really wanna grow old with the Stick Lady, like you sing, you got to catch up pretty fast. What with arthritis and heavy drinking she is almost all ready there.

As for me, letting you hold the remote control is a deal breaker anyway! But for starters you could sing that song for me.

Updated:
My good fried Vibha is furious over this post (see comments). That makes me think I should have written more here, rather than leaving it to the readers interpretation. But then, I can always update my own post, right? I updated a few things in the main part. And the rest is here.

Did you notice that this song is not about some abstract idea of love and heart and all the nice things in between. Its about the fact of growing old with someone (that in my opinion is a very very big commitment,) while one party taking taking full responsibility of the well being of the other. If there is any such commitment from the lady, I can't figure that out from the song. Now when it comes to it, I am not aware of any such song.

While at that have you ever noticed, how there are so less songs (I don't know any, like I said before) with same idea from the point of view of a woman. Despite the fact that men are built to fare worse when they grow old.

Now what are my options here, crib about it, just accept it, demand an equal commitment (in the title) or make fun of it. I chose the last few.

It keeps moving on, only ahead!

Quite a few things happen in our lives in only few days. Small things really, when compared to the long lives that people live. Things small enough not to fill up a dedicated post. Here is a small compilation.

My last manager GC left for higher studies. After eleven long years, starting as a fresher, in the same organization, I suspect it was boredom that took him. But he was a great manager. You can tell that by the fact that I had about six months of peaceful time with him. He surely knew what he was talking about. At the farewell lunch he was wondering what to take from here. I offered myself. But he refused. Apparently he wanted to take only nice things from here. But I can be nice too, if paid well.

I am still hoping that I would get together with some of my friends that left for US of A.

Entire Polish leadership wiped away in a plane crash.

Then my manager’s manager’s manager left for god knows what. Knowing him, one could safely say he would make something out of his life outside of IT. The philosophical guy that he was, I for one would be surprised if he does not. One of his oft stated idea was “one has to be unfair to be fair”. I disagree, but that’s another post if I get around to it. I always wonder how close we would have been but for the quarterly ‘group name calling’ against me that used to happened in his office. Good luck RH. I believe that the nice guys are the ones that make it.

I still hope to go back to school.

A junior colleague and good friend SSM is quitting and joining his dream organization. Always knew that he is not cut for IT services. Soon I won’t get to see him every day.

Two gang-rapes in the city within a week. Thank fully not by the expats in the state, else it would have been carnage by the self styled local armies for protecting the local culture from bad influence from people from Bihar and UP.

A friend took time out of her super busy schedule to give me a guilt trip. I appreciate it, but there isn’t going to be another chance. This is it.

I moved to another building at work. This has super cold meeting rooms. I like to think that it’s a nice way of cutting down on all ready cold meetings.

A gay professor suspended by one of the most reputed universities in the country. For being gay. The guy died a few days later. We still don’t know if it was a suicide.

Seventy six paramilitary personnel butchered by the naxals. Guess this is the time for the State to unleash its power.

Last weekend on Bombay airport, a lady friend of mine remarked that I looked hot. Well dear, it must have been humid too. It’s not me, that’s how the climate in Bombay is.

So you see folks, life does move on. And we have tomorrow and the day after. And we still hope that it will be better with lesser plane crashes, no more people going away and lesser rapes. Of course I would want to be called hot, only in slightly cooler climes. Just to take care of the ambiguity.

By the way, the question was, “What is the most intriguing thing about life?” 

You and I just live on

How many times you meet people you think you are so in synch with. There are those people whom you want to embrace and not let go ever. You think you will be friends forever, will stay close forever and will realize the common dreams together. In the pleasure of the company of the friends and the camaraderie and the common thoughts and so many other things, you tend to forget something so important. We are all different people. And what is not common will, more often than not, be bigger and more important than what is. Even for what is common, there are different backgrounds, different constraints and different conditions that one has to contend with to realize it.

So we part. Sometimes forever, sometimes for a long time and sometimes we part only to meet intermittently. And who is to blame? No one, really.

I leave you with this small poem. This is where the line in the description of this blog’s title comes from.  And I am truly jealous of you if you can see, talk, reach out to and touch people whom you want to, anytime you want to and every time you want to. You are lucky and blessed.

See that wave running

Running to the shore

Crash into its embrace

Like there's nothing more

See that shore waiting

Dry, waiting to be quenched

Soak the mighty wave in it

Let go through fists clenched

Together now and part

On and on, it goes on

So do arms on the clock

You and I just live on