Tigers and such and lack thereof

When I wrote the last time on this blog, I remember a wooly mammoth walking by my window. We don’t see too many of them these days. I think it’s been a long time since I wrote.

By the way mammoths were not really mammoth size wise. They were smaller than the current day elephants which don’t pass by the windows. I don’t know if any one actually harvested wool from the wooly parts of the mammoth but I am surely amused by the genius in calling a cute little (little compared to elephants which don’t walk by the windows) thing as ‘wooly’ mammoth. Some would point out a lurking greed in the act; I say it’s an inspired imagination.

When I enquired about why these elephants are not walking by, I found that they have been really busy in hauling logs, going to safaris, blessing people in temples and jingling those thick iron chains tied to their feet. Someone told me that they are actually trying to break free, but I think that the jingling of those chains is rather amusing. They, of course, do all of this when they are not supplying ivory. Busy folks these elephants are, I can tell you.

If you thought elephants were big, I recommend a view of the big ugly whales. At least you will be accurate when you tell your kids about them. I recommend that you go see them fast. These days these guys are doing nothing much of use but dying. Just as well. They have lots of fat and take too much space anyways.

To top it, these whales eat too much. We are going to need all that food soon. You do need lots of energy to go shopping to those whooping big malls. How far do you think is the time when all the fields and the jungles will be paved? One needs lots of space for the malls and the roads leading to the malls and other industrial hubs.

Killing those big ugly whales seems so good and apt. We can eat their food to enjoy the beautiful creations we make on the space where we are growing food now. It all falls into place.

Coming back to the business of busy elephants; busy in taking people on elephant safaris. Most of these safaris are the attempts of some fools to spot these stupid tigers. These fools go ecstatic if they manage to spot one of these furtive animals. Once in a life time thing all right, but what is the use. The real smart people, anyways, find them easily and kill them.

Hats off to these smart people otherwise known as poachers (and I don’t know why). These guys are doing a great service by eliminating such dangerous animals. Tigers are known to attack the livestock and even the people who live in the protected tiger reserves. I say, raze the jungles and kill the tigers. We need to grow some wheat there before we will need to build a factory on the land and call it a special economic zone.

Thanks to our brave poachers we have 1411 (i.e. one thousand four hundred and eleven) tigers only. But the last leg is left, before we are ridden of such nefarious creature. Given the work done in past, I would give it but a few years.

I just hope one of them passes by my window before they go the way of saber tooth tigers. More about them later.

P.S:
They say satire is the lowest form of humor, but such is the situation. I have seen a tiger once. And the majestic thing that it is, even after so many years I can remember all details. And now we are looking at the possibility of not having them in a generation or two. Unless we do something about it.

Reading List - 2010

Last year has not been the best ever in my life. I would want to forget it in a hurry. Except that I managed to read 26 books in a very tumultuous year.
Coming up with this count took me some time. So I thought why not create a list and keep adding to it. Here is the list.

1. Heaven's Command : An Imperial Progress by Jan Morris (History)
2. The Life and Times of The Thunderbolt Kid by Bill Bryson (Memoir)
3. If God Was a Banker by 'I dont care, really' (Me too an MBA) (Pratyush says: Dont touch it even with a pole)
4. I Too Had a Love Story by Ravinder Singh (Love Story)
5. Dreams from My Father by Barack Obama (Memoir)
6. The Argumentative Indian by Amartya Sen (Economics/Philosophy/History)
7. BPO Sutra by Sudhindra Mokhasi (compilation of Indian BPO stories)
8. Love Story by Erich Segal (Romance)
9. The Audacity of Hope by Barack Obama (Politics)
10. Not Without My Daughter by Betty Mahmoody with William Hoffer (Memoir)
11. The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas (Adventure Classic)
12. Six Suspects by Vikas Swarup (Whodunnit)
13. India Unbound by Gurcharan Das (Political/economic)
14. The Hitchhiker's Guide to Galaxy by Douglas Adams (Sci-fi/comedy)
15. The Restaurant at the End of the Universe by Douglas Adams (Sci-fi/comedy)
16. Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert (Memoir of soul searching through 3 countries. A good one)
17. Life, the Universe and Everything by Douglas Adams (Sci-fi/comedy)
18. Night Train to Lisbon by Pascal Mercier (Awesome)
19. So Long, and Thanks For All The Fish by Douglas Adams (Sci-fi/comedy)
20. Mostly Harmless by Douglas Adams (Sci-fi/comedy)
21. The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown (Something or the other)
22. Pappilon by Henri Charriere (Autobiography/Prison Break)
23. An Unfinished Biography by Indira Goswami (Autobiography- marred by bad translation)
24. The Calcutta Chromosome by Amitav Ghosh (History-Mystery, not as good as his other works)
25. Siddhartha by Hermmann Hesse (Historical Fiction-Very nice)
26. Madame Bovary by Gustav Flaubert (Drama Classic)
27. Tess of the d'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy (Drama Classic)
28. The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas (Historical Fiction, Adventure)
29. Gunaho Ka Devta by Dr. Dharamvir Bharati (Hindi, Social)
30. Rag Darbari by Sri Lal Sukla (Hindi, Social)
31. Mujhe Chand Chahiye by Surendra Verma (Hindi, Social, Just about OK)
32. The Witness for the Prosecution and Other Stories by Agatha Christie (Mystery, good as always)